Introduction

In this entry, I want to discuss a subject that is very close to my heart: A journey in the Desert. One Sunday, after coming out of church, I noticed a young woman talking with my wife. This promising young lady, a Sub-Saharan African who had come to Belgium to study agricultural engineering, shared her struggles with finding employment and navigating her romantic life. Her story resonated deeply with me, as it mirrored my own experiences from a few years ago on another continent. I faced similar challenges, enduring a period that felt like wandering through a desert—an endless struggle with no apparent solution. Waking up each day seemed meaningless, and I began questioning my existence and purpose. Some people refer to this state as an existential crisis; others call it depression. Regardless of the label, I want to offer practical ways to navigate this desert successfully.

The Geographical Limits of the Desert

Understand that a desert is geographically limited. No matter how daunting your problem seems, it will eventually come to an end and be behind you. Reflecting on recent history, there was a time when wearing masks in public was mandatory worldwide. Since March 6th, 2020, the United States has mandated masks in all public spaces, and social gatherings have been prohibited, even for families during Christmas. This mandate lasted until 2022, and while we lived through it, it felt endless.

Similarly, during a difficult period in my life, I was jobless for what felt like years. During my job hunt, I encountered two recurring issues: I was either overqualified or underqualified for the positions I applied for, which left me without options. I have the most stable job I’ve ever had today, and those struggles feel like distant memories. Be confident that this, too, shall pass.

You Are Not Alone in the Desert

Understand that a desert, though vast, is not uninhabited. No matter how unique your circumstances seem, someone else is either going through them or has already overcome them. You don’t have to feel alone or isolate yourself. Seek help and confide in trusted individuals. It’s a misconception that no one can understand your pain or the stakes involved. As Dr. Tony Evans has said, if someone isn’t currently in a storm, they either come out of one or are about to enter one. I had the privilege of being part of a group of men with whom I confided at least once a week. We confessed and prayed for each other, fostering healing and support.

Your Story Continues Beyond the Desert

Understand that entering a desert doesn’t mark the end of your story. Every time you wake up, you have the chance to change the course of your life. You don’t have to remain a statistic of failure. The pen of your story is in your hand, and no one else holds the key to your destiny. Take Tom Brady, for example. He was picked 199th in the 2000 NFL draft, and scouts doubted his physical abilities and potential. Despite these low expectations, he retired in 2022 as a seven-time Super Bowl champion, the most of any player in the league’s history.

Similarly, when I arrived in Belgium, someone criticized my job hunt just four months in, suggesting odd tactics. I knew my worth and persisted with a daily routine of learning and searching, trusting that preparation would meet opportunity. Today, that same person hands out my business cards. Remember, the end of a matter is better than its beginning, and patience is better than pride.

The Desert Cannot Dry Love

Understand that the desert cannot dry love. The best definition of love I have ever encountered is this: Caring deeply for someone and involving yourself in their life for their good. Love goes beyond fleeting feelings, which, by nature, are as changeable as the wind. Your feelings, no matter how valid they may seem, are volatile. There is someone out there who truly cares for you, whose life choices you deeply affect, and who believes in your value. Your life is precious beyond what you can imagine. It was easy for me to write that definition of love earlier, but since 2023, I have genuinely believed that as human beings, we do not fully understand how deep love can go. I followed a calendar where I prayed for a different people group every day. Just the thought that someone out there, whom you don’t know, is interceding to the Creator of the universe on your behalf gave me chills. Do not doubt that you are loved and precious. Can a mother forget her nursing child? Can she feel no love for the child she has borne? But even if that were possible, the Lord God, our Creator, would not forget you.

The Desert Is Your Place of Growth

Understand that the desert is your place of growth. When I was younger, I read a lot of manga, Japanese comic books. A recurring trope in the Shonen genre, comics for boys, is the “time skip.” The main character or cast encounters an obstacle or event that makes them realize their current level of prowess is insufficient to achieve their ultimate goal. They embark on a mini journey off-screen, and when they reappear, they have grown and developed new attributes. This time skip maintains a good pace for the reader while allowing the characters to mature without becoming boring. Readers anticipate the characters’ return, eager to see their new, refreshed look and powerful attributes. Similarly, the purpose of the desert is not to break you, but to mature you through pruning.

Conclusion

You may not be ready for the next level of your life that you envision. That’s hard to hear. For myself, I envisioned building a family, but I was too immature at several levels. I was coasting through life on mere talent without pushing myself, trying to keep up appearances, running from responsibilities, and living “freely.” These attitudes built up frustrations, and I needed time to shed this accumulated baggage. It was long and tedious—no time skip. I had to face uncomfortable situations, as described earlier. All of this prepared me to have the little family I cherish today, which I hope will grow further. The desert is an unavoidable and indispensable step to reach the next level.

The desert is an unavoidable and indispensable step to reach the next level. Joss Ilunga

It’s hard, but anticipate the refreshed version of yourself emerging from the desert. Consider that the sufferings of the present times are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed to you.

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